My Near Future Letter To Maximumrocknroll, Rough Draft

Har har just fooled ya. I got nothing to say. Oh there is the whole thing on my mind on how this magazine Maximumrocknroll could be improved. But not in the magazine's entirety. There is only one area which I would choose to change, if I were CEO or "Coordinator". The Reviews!! My objection is that not everyone listens to every new punk band around. It seems the reviewers fail to realize that a new reader or member of the punk community may be checking out the mag for the first time ever. A common misconception is that EVERY punk knows about EVERY punk band around. Unfortunately, most of us have other things on the mind, and have not had the ability to sample every band of the world, as the reviewers clearly have. One thing that could be taken to heart is a few details on what music the band plays. As easy as it is to find things on the internet, some of us don't know all the bands you compare new bands to. For example, 'well it sounds like Ty Segall and Fucked Up had a baby.' What does that mean to a new reader?? Why not define the music as either 60s, thrash, heavy metal, or 77 punk as you used to? And if it's psych pop, garage pop, electro, don't review it. Also power pop and poppunk are good buzzwords to throw out there for us. What is powerviolence? What is Grindcore? Why all the words anyways? Provide clear examples of the MUSIC ITSELF. Not, "well I hate the artwork, my stomach hurts so I hate every record I reviewed today." Then give a review of the content, lyrics, etc.., and let us decide. Don't hide the music in a riddle of obscure bands/buzzwords most of us haven't heard of yet. It would be nice to get a more classical description of the band, based at the least, on bands every punk is sure to know. The classic major bands would be a good launch point. This may sound kind of contrived to those whose job is to delve into every nook and cranny of punkish music, but the fact remains, we don't know every recent band, nor should we. The classics set the stage, and many genres of "mainstream" music factor into the punk movement. It seems the actual punk bands take a backseat review-wise in relation to other experimental sounding bands. All I ask is please get those reviews on the right track. The artists hurt as a result, and so does the scene in general. I would love to listen to more recent music, but am confused as a result of your reviews as to where to look for parallels to some classic punk faves I have. And being left to decipher whether or not it's actually punk can be all too annoying as well.

Awful Day

Nine Oclock and I'm thinking about a run up to Meijer for some replacement razors. I'm low on the mach 3 replacements and have been resorting to shaving with single blade disposable bics. Taking one of those to my face is like playing russian roulette, because I know I'm going to get cut, but not when. Throw the car into reverse and BLAM! Flat tire. in the driveway. At this point, I'm pissed off. Get out the spare saver and proceed to undo the lugs and get the old tire off. After about ten minutes I am covered in sweat and throw my shirt to the porch to finish the job. Thirty minutes later, and my back looks like malaria city. I have at least twenty mosquito bites on my back and, oh, how they are itchy and horrible looking.

Fast forward to the next morning. I figure I'll head up to the tire joint and get it replaced for free. Not Free! Costs me almost thirty five dollars to reinsure the new tire and purchase new lugnuts, which are apparently stripped. So I wait from 8:30 to 9:15 for them to take care of it when one employee calls me over. He knows why I got the flat in the first place. The heavy-duty spring near the strut snapped and its jagged edge was pointing directly at the tire. So he offers me a place he "recommends" down the street. I say to put on the spare and get me out of there. So he does. Minutes later, I'm headed down the fifteen mile ride to my mechanic. Takes me forty minutes. Flashers on, idiots honking at me, and plenty of fingers to go around. Luckily my cousin was near my shop at the time so I got a ride out to work later.

Work went fine, and I'm alive so I cannot complain that much. Hope to get the shitmobile back tomorrow though. Just a long line of bull I've had to put up with for the past week. Feel my pain?

-Ryan-

Time Flies..

Excellent album by the Subhumans (UK). Half live, half studio, quite the ripper. Bought a copy of it at the local record shop and was shocked that it still had the original insert plus a smaller insert including the list of demos one could send for with 50p along with a blank cassette tape! What some would pay for those demos nowadays, I'll tell ya. Anyhow, a complete reassurance that they were doing everything right as a group, and the lyrics to People Are Scared resonate with me a lot. Also picked up a terrible skippy version of a Rezillos live show, I feel cheated by that, but Time Flies completely made up for it. Hope you enjoy the tracks on this as much as I did. Till next time//

me as a cartoon

more to come, maybe.

Good lansing band from the old time

Awesome band. I can't believe I hadn't listened to these boys from my home state's LP in such a long time. The Crucifucks. Deranged lyrical style, interesting guitar/bass/drum killing, and some of the best (and still relevant) lyrical content one little punk could hope to find. Look them up for yourself if you don't believe me, but "Can you believe we're being plagued by religion still? These Christians aren't about to give up!" is a sample of what's in store for them virgin ears out there. A sweet bonus are the actual police recordings related to the band inserted in the space between their songs. The one line to the cop by Doc gets me every time! Just further proof that punk was extremely misunderstood by the cops and "society" in the 80s. Guaranteed enjoyment by all punks who haven't checked them out- and that enjoy the Feederz and Dead Kennedys. Oh just look it up already, it's the internet!

Crucial Youth and Grudge

Which is better at making fun of the reaction of the supposed straight edge mentality? Well Crucial Youth were the first and from what I gather had the most obnoxious lyrics. The bashing of cursing, masturbating, dirty teeth, littering..etc...are the most hilarious things I have ever heard. I believe that they are really not too opposed to the SXE style of living, yet are making fun of everyone that thinks Ian and the rest were preaching Nazis. In my opinion, not drinking is alright, it keeps you focused. Not that I don't drink, (love the drink) but staying focused on the problems in society is something everyone should aspire to. Giving your full attention to various societal/governmental problems is something everyone can agree upon. Ok? Remember "You call it religion, you're full of shit. You picked up a bible, and now you're gone."

Then there's Grudge. They compose their songs of mass thrash in a remarkably straight edge-ish style, with lyrics that are completely anti SXE. I think it is also hilarious when they say Drinking's Great, and that "when we see you pissed at us it really makes us smile." Apart from that, they seem to be more anti straight edge and furious at the entire movement, and are doing it to get a reaction. That's how I feel anyway.

Do you have a humble opinion about such things? Let me know what is the better FAKE STRAIGHT EDGE BAND? And if you hate SXE, give me a reason please. Once again, I'm not an x-er. At the same time, I don't hate on their feelings of focusing their energy fully on correcting various problems within the "scene". For example today, using fashion and coolness as an excuse for not showing energy or getting together with other punks. Let me know, I'm dying to hear from the masses on this one.

what does god mean to me?

So it has been a good weekend. I went out to the west side of this state, Michigan, to spend the weekend with my brother and his friend at said friends' apartment. Got a pretty sick sunburn, too. Now, we went out and were at a restaurant and somehow started talking about religion, and how it relates to us. I am an atheist and started to explain how I don't go to church anymore and what I have gotten out of religion. I stated that even though I don't go, and I don't worship and pray, that if I got anything out of my upbringing as a Roman Catholic, it was to be good to other people. This just seems like common sense to me, and I don't believe that one should worship just to be able to carry out their lives in a non-dickish way to other people. I also explained that there are so many things wrong with the church and that if one knows anything about the crusades past and present, and the current pedophelia sweeping the rectories, that there are things wrong with the inherent culture of the modern church. My brother and his friend are both Catholics and go to church regularly. In so many words, they related that they feel they go to actually feel a relationship with god. Through being at a church on a Sunday, they feel more of a connection. And then asked me, "what started the big bang?". To which I replied there are so many millions of galaxies and that we are an accident. Then his friend asked me, "so there's nothing that put it all into motion?" and that "at a certain point one has to believe in some kind of god, right?" And what can I say, other than I don't know. I stated that even though I don't know that (which nobody does), it is not like I am going to ask for confession on my death bed when I know it is not fair if I don't go to church. And as a side note, I got confirmed, and my brother doesn't which he feels is unfair because I no longer believe. Just go do it if you're so jealous! It's really not that difficult, and if someone believes that much, they should at least be allowed into heaven, but only if they take the right classes, right?

Anyway, it goes back to an old philosophical question of religion and what are the benefits of not going vs. the benefits of going to church. On one hand, you don't go. You have saved a lot of time. If god doesn't exist, you spent that time in a better manner than wasting it in church. However, if he does exist, you are going to hell. However, you may go to church. In that case you waste a lot of time going to Church and doing whatever you do as a practicing (add religion here). If your particular god exists, then you go to heaven. If your god does not exist, then you have wasted a great deal of time and effort. The thing I'm saying is that who knows what the right religion is, and if going is necessary. But the thing all religions (I think) can agree on is being good to one another, a thing I brought up to them. I don't feel the need to waste my time to achieve something that comes off as common sense. Besides, I don't agree with every tenet of the church in terms of Abortion, Gay Marriage, Women's Rights, Morality, Drug Use, Sexual Conduct, or Freedom of Expression. All of these things also lead me away from a pew into my own mind, where I can formulate my own opinions. They are also the same beliefs that would place me in direct conflict with the same church I once belonged to, or should still belong to. I'm sure it would not be happy with anyone that did not believe the same things it did. If people want to worship, I'm not going to convert them away, whatever helps them get through the night is fine with me. Everyone has separate experiences when it comes to religion, and through their socialization in terms of religious views. For me, CRASS played a big part. Anyways, religion is mostly okay, however when it is used in terms of politics and through guilt trips, they make me uncomfortable. It is also a thing that can be used to springboard prejudices: see "cheap Jews", "radical Islam", etc. etc. So worship what you want, just don't use it to try to intrude onto the majority of the ideals I have or by supporting causes which try to push a specific religious agenda in my or anyones' government. I can't explain all of this in one column, but you get the gist. God means nothing to me, I'll take my chances on my own. If I'm wrong, I'm wrong.

Remember, no one rules.