My Near Future Letter To Maximumrocknroll, Rough Draft

Har har just fooled ya. I got nothing to say. Oh there is the whole thing on my mind on how this magazine Maximumrocknroll could be improved. But not in the magazine's entirety. There is only one area which I would choose to change, if I were CEO or "Coordinator". The Reviews!! My objection is that not everyone listens to every new punk band around. It seems the reviewers fail to realize that a new reader or member of the punk community may be checking out the mag for the first time ever. A common misconception is that EVERY punk knows about EVERY punk band around. Unfortunately, most of us have other things on the mind, and have not had the ability to sample every band of the world, as the reviewers clearly have. One thing that could be taken to heart is a few details on what music the band plays. As easy as it is to find things on the internet, some of us don't know all the bands you compare new bands to. For example, 'well it sounds like Ty Segall and Fucked Up had a baby.' What does that mean to a new reader?? Why not define the music as either 60s, thrash, heavy metal, or 77 punk as you used to? And if it's psych pop, garage pop, electro, don't review it. Also power pop and poppunk are good buzzwords to throw out there for us. What is powerviolence? What is Grindcore? Why all the words anyways? Provide clear examples of the MUSIC ITSELF. Not, "well I hate the artwork, my stomach hurts so I hate every record I reviewed today." Then give a review of the content, lyrics, etc.., and let us decide. Don't hide the music in a riddle of obscure bands/buzzwords most of us haven't heard of yet. It would be nice to get a more classical description of the band, based at the least, on bands every punk is sure to know. The classic major bands would be a good launch point. This may sound kind of contrived to those whose job is to delve into every nook and cranny of punkish music, but the fact remains, we don't know every recent band, nor should we. The classics set the stage, and many genres of "mainstream" music factor into the punk movement. It seems the actual punk bands take a backseat review-wise in relation to other experimental sounding bands. All I ask is please get those reviews on the right track. The artists hurt as a result, and so does the scene in general. I would love to listen to more recent music, but am confused as a result of your reviews as to where to look for parallels to some classic punk faves I have. And being left to decipher whether or not it's actually punk can be all too annoying as well.

Awful Day

Nine Oclock and I'm thinking about a run up to Meijer for some replacement razors. I'm low on the mach 3 replacements and have been resorting to shaving with single blade disposable bics. Taking one of those to my face is like playing russian roulette, because I know I'm going to get cut, but not when. Throw the car into reverse and BLAM! Flat tire. in the driveway. At this point, I'm pissed off. Get out the spare saver and proceed to undo the lugs and get the old tire off. After about ten minutes I am covered in sweat and throw my shirt to the porch to finish the job. Thirty minutes later, and my back looks like malaria city. I have at least twenty mosquito bites on my back and, oh, how they are itchy and horrible looking.

Fast forward to the next morning. I figure I'll head up to the tire joint and get it replaced for free. Not Free! Costs me almost thirty five dollars to reinsure the new tire and purchase new lugnuts, which are apparently stripped. So I wait from 8:30 to 9:15 for them to take care of it when one employee calls me over. He knows why I got the flat in the first place. The heavy-duty spring near the strut snapped and its jagged edge was pointing directly at the tire. So he offers me a place he "recommends" down the street. I say to put on the spare and get me out of there. So he does. Minutes later, I'm headed down the fifteen mile ride to my mechanic. Takes me forty minutes. Flashers on, idiots honking at me, and plenty of fingers to go around. Luckily my cousin was near my shop at the time so I got a ride out to work later.

Work went fine, and I'm alive so I cannot complain that much. Hope to get the shitmobile back tomorrow though. Just a long line of bull I've had to put up with for the past week. Feel my pain?

-Ryan-

Time Flies..

Excellent album by the Subhumans (UK). Half live, half studio, quite the ripper. Bought a copy of it at the local record shop and was shocked that it still had the original insert plus a smaller insert including the list of demos one could send for with 50p along with a blank cassette tape! What some would pay for those demos nowadays, I'll tell ya. Anyhow, a complete reassurance that they were doing everything right as a group, and the lyrics to People Are Scared resonate with me a lot. Also picked up a terrible skippy version of a Rezillos live show, I feel cheated by that, but Time Flies completely made up for it. Hope you enjoy the tracks on this as much as I did. Till next time//

me as a cartoon

more to come, maybe.

Good lansing band from the old time

Awesome band. I can't believe I hadn't listened to these boys from my home state's LP in such a long time. The Crucifucks. Deranged lyrical style, interesting guitar/bass/drum killing, and some of the best (and still relevant) lyrical content one little punk could hope to find. Look them up for yourself if you don't believe me, but "Can you believe we're being plagued by religion still? These Christians aren't about to give up!" is a sample of what's in store for them virgin ears out there. A sweet bonus are the actual police recordings related to the band inserted in the space between their songs. The one line to the cop by Doc gets me every time! Just further proof that punk was extremely misunderstood by the cops and "society" in the 80s. Guaranteed enjoyment by all punks who haven't checked them out- and that enjoy the Feederz and Dead Kennedys. Oh just look it up already, it's the internet!